Anybody else not date?

[randomgamerguy1997]

I have never dated and don't really plan on it. I'm fine with being single and having the friends I've met through online games.

[Pokemanic33]

12 minutes ago, Nine Inch Heels said:

"Ideal" is a pretty vague term.

 

What I mean is that I feel like simply not being in the same physical space as a significant other may certainly help with my own mental health, but it wouldn't remedy the situation entirely. Just the mere thought of romantic involvement with another person was enough to make me feel tired and uncomfortable for lack of a better term.

 

12 minutes ago, Nine Inch Heels said:

I mean, talking about how you're feeling guilty for breaking up... Why though? I mean, if something really went horribly wrong and you hurt your ex that badly, you wouldn't even be friends with one another any more.

 

I feel better about it now, but I felt more guilty during the relationship than after. He had very strong feelings for me (last we talked about it he still does) and I had a deep feeling of dread from the moment it started, like "it" (for lack of a more helpful description) just wasn't there. So I guess what it comes down to is I felt like I was "stringing him along," leading him to believe in something I knew from the start was doomed for failure.

[GrogLoopy]

I don't believe in relationships or love in general, the only thing it does is hurt. Sure sex is cool, though I think friendships are a million times better than relationships. So if you can stay friends with someone willing to help you lose your virginity that's a win in my book. Sure I have a weird philosophy on this, but relationships get super complicated the later you stay in them.

[silentzorah]

I used to date around a lot, in high school and in college.  Only dated a little bit after college.  I found that I not only don't trust people, I also plain just don't like them.

 

So I stopped, and... honestly, I'm a lot happier now.  I don't feel like I need someone else to complete me.  It's very liberating.

[cnidaria]

I dated a lot in my teens and then ignored women for most of my 20's. Now nearing 30 it's bizarre to me that they wanted anything to do with me with how poorly I would act towards them. I'm starting to regret how I treated them and miss what we had, and have resolved to better myself to relive those days but with myself acting better

 

This is hitting me hard at the moment, what a poignant thread. I grew up in the emo/goth/skater scene and knew some amazing women when I was young. I never appreciated them fully. I've stayed in shape but not maintained my social skills or really worked on any sort of financial stability. Tinder and the like have been a mixed bag. Most women I've talked to have solely been looking for sex. This is hard to talk about. Teenage love cannot be matched. I wish I didn't care. I'm convinced that I'm one of those men who was supposed to die in a war at 25. I drink and play Doom instead

[maxmanium]

I'm almost 20 and I've not even kissed a woman, so I'd say yeah, lol. But that's really just my fault for being stupid.

[[McD] James]

Look, fam, nobody said dating is always going to be perfect. And yes, a lot of the time dating can cause pain. But saying that there isn't any joy to be taken from the experience just isn't true. A lot of us have experienced pain from our past relationships, but pain can be a learning experience and make us stronger. And when you move forward with someone you really care about and trust, all those past negative experiences can melt away in an instant. Don't dine on sour grapes. 

Edited January 27, 2020 by Ajora

[High On Berserk]

Never did. Did not see appeal in wasting my time. In current post-metoo #everythingisoffensive era even more so. Over years learned that few strong friendships is all man needs in his life.

[mrthejoshmon]

I dated once, met the girl of my fuckin dreams, turns out she was an illegal immigrant who was also a wackjob who got deported and I mean it when I say crazy, like she was nuts, she pretended to be dead then tried to pretend to be someone else then claimed she was possessed by a demon of lust when I tried to calmly break up with her (because it just wasn't gonna work giving she can't renter the country).

 

Other than that, pretty single.

[Mr. Freeze]

I like dating. It's the second and third date that's the nerve-wracking part. 

[seed]

Never did, and being a misanthrope certainly doesn't make me want to either.

 

Add to that all the shit they've made me go through... yeah, no thanks. I have friends and can interact with people just fine, but that doesn't mean I enjoy my time around them in general, I find them exhausting, noisy, untrustworthy, two-faced, and plain annoying more often than not. Besides, I'm too self-centered for this, I would be absolutely horrible in a relation, and I'm not sorry for it.

 

8 hours ago, silentzorah said:

I used to date around a lot, in high school and in college.  Only dated a little bit after college.  I found that I not only don't trust people, I also plain just don't like them.

 

So I stopped, and... honestly, I'm a lot happier now.  I don't feel like I need someone else to complete me.  It's very liberating.

 

^^^^^^^^^

 

Never contributed with anything positive to my life.

Edited January 27, 2020 by seed

[High On Berserk]

9 hours ago, silentzorah said:

I used to date around a lot, in high school and in college.  Only dated a little bit after college.  I found that I not only don't trust people, I also plain just don't like them.

 

So I stopped, and... honestly, I'm a lot happier now.  I don't feel like I need someone else to complete me.  It's very liberating.

Sometimes, things that are unbelievable or unthinkable for others ends up liberating us. Plus nowadays, most of planet's population is not trust worthy which naturally leads to not liking them.

[Guest MIND]

3 hours ago, seed said:

Never did, and being a misanthrope certainly doesn't make me want to either.

Very relatable here. I dont think the majority of the human population understands what misanthropy is and what it feels like to be one.

[seed]

10 minutes ago, MINDDomkr said:

Very relatable here. I dont think the majority of the human population understands what misanthropy is and what it feels like to be one.

 

If you're gonna run into someone who expects one to start shitting on them on sight or us "wasting time hating humans every day", then yes, definitely.

 

And frankly, I don't care.

[Jimmy]

I date kawaii Doom barrels

[CARRiON]

I'm probably what would be considered introverted. Socializing is exhausting. Small talk irritates me. I would rather play a video game, read a comic, watch a movie, or do something creative than ever go to a party or a bar or meet up with people. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

 

That being said, it's still not impossible to find someone and be introverted. The person I'm with now I met online in 2006, and it just sort of blossomed from a great friendship to a relationship over a long course of time. In 2015 I moved in with them. Some days we hang out, some days we do our own thing. Never would have imagined though...

[Chopkinsca]

I feel like an extroverted introvert. I love when I can actually have conversations with people. I like being around people in general. 

 

I'm not dating at the moment. I have someone I'm interested in, but the feeling isn't mutual. Eh, just friends it is.

[Guest MIND]

16 hours ago, cnidaria said:

I dated a lot in my teens and then ignored women for most of my 20's. Now nearing 30 it's bizarre to me that they wanted anything to do with me with how poorly I would act towards them. I'm starting to regret how I treated them and miss what we had, and have resolved to better myself to relive those days but with myself acting better

 

This is hitting me hard at the moment, what a poignant thread. I grew up in the emo/goth/skater scene and knew some amazing women when I was young. I never appreciated them fully. I've stayed in shape but not maintained my social skills or really worked on any sort of financial stability. Tinder and the like have been a mixed bag. Most women I've talked to have solely been looking for sex. This is hard to talk about. Teenage love cannot be matched. I wish I didn't care. I'm convinced that I'm one of those men who was supposed to die in a war at 25. I drink and play Doom instead

If you're nearing 30 theres no point in dating anymore. Younger women dont want you and the older ones all likely have major baggage and or/other issues. A lot probably have kids who they want you to look after as well. No thanks.

Edited January 27, 2020 by MIND

[DuckReconMajor]

Oof. I was mostly with you until here. Are there people without baggage? 

[Hcoop111]

I was at a stage where i was about to give up on women completely and just go solo for the rest of my life all cheated ( bad at picking them) ..but i gave somebody the final chance and thought what the hell try this shit once more...now 3 yrs later still together...but if i didnt id probably not bother with dating...people play to many mind games and want to much for my liking 

[[McD] James]

1 hour ago, MINDDomkr said:

If you're nearing 30 theres no point in dating anymore. Younger women dont want you and the older ones all likely have major baggage and or/other issues. A lot probably have kids who they want you to look after as well. No thanks.

 

Dude, no. 

[Chezza]

I don't date, I haven't for a decade and became quite content with it. I'm an introvert but able to meet new people and be chatty if I make an effort thanks to my experience in Sales.

 

I do consider myself a healthy minded person with good emotional intelligence. In saying that I'm now out of my 20s and realise I should start dating. I believe the peak of my life would be when I'm married with children. However being shy and skeptic of modern platforms makes it difficult to start.

 

I will get around to it, eventually.

[little egg]

do dating sims and VNs count as dating?

[Guest MIND]

34 minutes ago, Ajora said:

 

Dude, no. 

Yeah. It just gets worse and worse.

[Guest MIND]

49 minutes ago, DuckReconMajor said:

Oof. I was mostly with you until here. Are there people without baggage?  

A 25-30 year old woman is probably going to have much more than a 20-25 year old. Double that for a 30-35 year old woman.

[little egg]

i think you have a lot of baggage

[Summer Deep]

No-one's mentioned Autism/Asperger type issues here, but I'm sure those are a factor for one or two of the posters in this thread. I know they are for me, LOL.

[[McD] James]

19 minutes ago, MINDDomkr said:

Yeah. It just gets worse and worse.

 

Speak for yourself, man. 

[Nine Inch Heels]

Just now, Ajora said:

 

Speak for yourself, man. 

I think that has been the case so far.

[Guest MIND]

9 minutes ago, Summer Deep said:

No-one's mentioned Autism/Asperger type issues here, but I'm sure those are a factor for one or two of the posters in this thread. I know they are for me, LOL.

The only way my Autism limits me from dating is that I have very specific interests and they're usually very male-centered, like Fishing, Camping, etc. They're solo activities.

I'm not into bars, I don't keep up with relevant pop culture, etc.

Edited January 27, 2020 by MIND