If Doomguy had one-liners...

[Egg Boy]

9 minutes ago, SilverMiner said:

If Doom had one-liners, I wouldn't be playing Doom

Same haha

[roadworx]

"I DISLIKE YOU."

 

"I WOULD APPRECIATE IT IF YOU WOULD BECOME DECEASED FROM THE HIGH-VELOCITY PROJECTILES THAT I AM CURRENTLY FIRING IN YOUR DIRECTION."

 

"I WILL SEPARATE YOUR HEAD FROM YOUR TORSO AND THEN PROCEED TO DEFECATE INTO YOUR ESOPHAGUS."

 

"YOU ARE ALL VERY RUDE."

 

"DESPITE POPULAR BELIEF, A LARGE STATURE DOES NOT INDICATE THE PRESENCE OF A LARGE GASTROINTESTINAL TRACT."

[Kizoky]

"One less Demon to Caco now"

[Avoozl]

That's one nuked Duke

[wallabra]

"Gahh! Stupid ass purple dogs bitin' my ass!"

 

He's cleaning up other people's mess. He's a mere marine, an underdog of the corporations. He just wants to get it over already. That explains the tauntingly bittersweet E1 end text screen. After all, where's the big fat prize? Or, in other words, I did my god damn job, can I get my check and go home now?!

 

2 hours ago, Rudolph said:

As far as Doom 2016/Doom Eternal go, I would love him to have a big manchild personality like in the infamous Doom comic: 

 

Samuel Hayden: "Welcome. I'm Dr. Samuel Hayden. I'm the head of this facility. I think we can work together and-"

Doomguy: "LALALALALALA! I AM NOT LISTENING TO YOU! LALALALALA!"

 

Samuel Hayden: "Come to the VEGA terminal-"

Doomguy: "NUH-HUH! YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!"

Samuel Hayden: "But you need me to-"

Doomguy: "LALALALA! I AM NOT LISTENING!"

Samuel Hayden: "... I'm blocking your access to the facility scanner. You cannot progress further until you come to see me."

Doomguy: "AWWW! BUT I DON'T WANNA!"

 

So basically Freeman's Mind but Doomguy? Aaaa I'm loving it!

[Chip]

I had to refer to this terrible DOOM Comic script I made last year. none of my one-liners were remotely cool,  the only one that sounded like it could be something was after he killed the Spider Mastermind. It went, "I guess you could call me a cat, cuz' I've got 9 more lives" I'm not even sure if that makes sense, but I guess with a bit of rework it could be something. 

[Rudolph]

2 minutes ago, Gustavo6046 said:

So basically Freeman's Mind but Doomguy? Aaaa I'm loving it!

I must admit, I am not familiar with Freeman's Mind at all.

[Doomkid]

“Golly, looks like all my buddies are dead! I guess I better teach these rapscallions what for.. Aww shucks, I only have a pea shooter!” (Cue slide trombone)

Edited May 2, 2021 by Doomkid

[Redneckerz]

• Against zombieman: "Guess we will Duke it out then"
• When seeing Impse: "ah, heh, heh.."
• To Cyberdemon: "I know you are stupid, i know you are a fool, but everything you do is a big bada boom."

[leodoom85]

After killing an archvile: "Try reviving yourself now, you skinny bastard"

[Komenja]

 

[Wavy]

"If it wasn't my old friend, Mr. Swiss Cheese"

[Fort Escapades]

"Die."

[VoanHead]

"I'll give you something to scream about. You bonehead!"-when encountering Revenant.

"Bring it on, fatso!"-when encountering Mancubus.

"Looks like the Duke got Nuked."-encountering secret that contains Duke Nukem's corpse.

[Dexiaz]

 

UPD: “The only one who can really beat me... is me”

 

Wait...WHAT. Doom Eternal's plot was created in Quake 3? *Dun dun duuuuuuuuun*

Edited May 2, 2021 by Dexiaz

[Artman2004]

"Hey, I thought you demons liked fire!" when using an incendiary weapon against a demon.

"Remember kids, eat your greens!" when using the BFG-9000.

"Hey fatso, you need to go on a diet, OF LEAD!" When fighting a Mancubus.

[The_SloVinator]

5 hours ago, Komenja said:

 

He really almost sounds like Caleb.

 

But yea, now that I think about it, it definitely would sound odd to hear Doomguy one-liners in action since we aren't used to it but nonetheless, this is a great experiment to see some interesting things you guys come up with. :)

 

[Gez]

"Get out of my stations!"

"You're going down!"

"I'll sunder your vile flesh!"

"You're beyond revival, now"

"I'm number one at killin'"

"I bring you swift death"

"There's always room for more death"

"Hey, chillax!"

[Joshy]

"With cool, dry wit like that, I could be an action hero."

[Biodegradable]

"Gonna pummel you into a fine paste and spread you on my toast!"

[Telemassacre]

*when seeing an arachnotron*

"You fool. You absolute fool. Your plasma gun might be powerful, but mine is faster."

[wallabra]

14 hours ago, Artman2004 said:

"Hey, I thought you demons liked fire!" when using an incendiary weapon against a demon.

 

So basically the Heartland flamethrower?

 

14 hours ago, Artman2004 said:

"Remember kids, eat your greens!" when using the BFG-9000.

 

So basically the thing the Diablo says in Diablo 1. (Yeah, that kinda secret. I swear Romero gave birth to a wierd trope or something...)

 

14 hours ago, Artman2004 said:

"Hey fatso, you need to go on a diet, OF LEAD!" When fighting a Mancubus.

 

So basically, uh, dunno..... passion-fruits??

[TheMagicMushroomMan]

To arachnotron:

 

"Time to make some SPAM!!!"

 

[Malurek]

"Do you have a minute to talk about Jesus Christ?", ...... "DONT RUN FROM THE LORD!"

[Splatter]

It's-a me, Doomguy!

[jerk-o]

The Quotes section of this doomwiki entry:

https://doomwiki.org/wiki/Doom_comic

[Mr. Alexander]

i'm gonna reach the damn exit button for the Lord

[leodoom85]

To the revenant: "You look better cremated"
To archviles: "Who's the Hunted now?"
To mancubus: "You're dead. Simple as that"
To the mastermind: "I'm gonna rip your limbs out and stick it up to your brain"

To zombies: "heh...You are too weak to be called evil residents"

To the keens: "You were hanging out for too long..."

 

 

[insertwackynamehere]

He’d probably say “cowabunga” and “eat my shorts” like that cool tv kid

[Gez]

3 hours ago, insertwackynamehere said:

He’d probably say “cowabunga” and “eat my shorts” like that cool tv kid

"Don't have a siege cow, man"