English is the stupidest language ever, bar none

[Eyes]

I am not a native English speaker, but in my opinion English is one of the easiest languages to learn and speak. There isn't much to worry about because the rules are pretty straight forward. 

[Dark Pulse]

14 minutes ago, Eyes said:

I am not a native English speaker, but in my opinion English is one of the easiest languages to learn and speak. There isn't much to worry about because the rules are pretty straight forward. 

Box = Boxes

Ox = Oxes Oxen

Sheep = Sheeps Sheepen Sheep

 

Why do they call them cowboys? Cows is girls, bulls is boys. Oughta be cowgirls and bullboys.

 

Why do they call a statue a "bust" when it stops right before the part it'd be named after?

 

Why do they call them buildings when they're already done building them? They oughta call them "builts."

 

Why do they call it a TV Set when you only get one?

 

Why do they call a women's prison a "penal colony?"

 

I can't take credit for any of those questions above, though. I'll just leave this here. He's got some extra wisdom past that, if you care to watch the whole thing, such as on pronunciation with how words are spelled.

 

 

Edited May 31, 2021 by Dark Pulse

[ketmar]

2 minutes ago, Dark Pulse said:

Why do they call it a TV Set when you only get one?

at least this has the easy answer in the history of television. ;-)

[Zenki]

1 hour ago, Dark Pulse said:

Yes, yes, I quite remember 99 - quatre-vingt-dix-neuf. Literal translation: "Four-twenty ten nine." English: Three syllables, French: Five.

 

As for the Romans... how?

 

I = 1

V = 5

X = 10

L = 50

C = 100

D = 500

M = 1000

Line over any letter = Multiply by 1000

 

How the fuck, with that numbering system, did you get "four-twenty"?

 

My bad, i mean Gallic system ! they counted by twentys and not by tens ! 80 : 4x20. That's stupid anyway

[Azuris]

10 hours ago, Zenki said:

Difficult langage ? Learn french guys, it's a pain in the ass if you're non native speacker. I am, and still a lot of french people make mistakes EVERY F**KING DAYS 

 

 

 

English and French suffer from the same historical Influence they have got.

 

French is a romance Language that first got a heavy Influence from celtic Languages and than from germanic Languages (first the main Land ones, later english).

English is a germanic Language with heavy french, latin, celtic and other Influences.

 

Both have moved way apart from their roots, the Pronunciation is not as close to the single Letters as it is with other Languages of their Family and the Grammar also changed much.

 

Spanish for Example is one of the closest what comes to every Letter is spoken as written.

English is brutally far away from that Ideal and French also.

Also italian is very close to that Ideal.

 

As an Example, i can speak spanish, german, english and italian.

I can easily talk to portuguese People with some Effort or to Dutch.

I also learned Italian because of the Relationship (latin is the Mommy).

But French? I can now read and understand it mostly because i have learned Italian, but there is no Way i could understand it.

Without School i would never have learned English in a "natural" Way.

 

Also the loss of many Terms and other Forms makes english strange and somehow limits the Way you can Express Things.

 

English would be also easier to understand for others (german, dutch) if it still would use "Thou".

 

I am not sure if i am using it right, but i try a little comperasion:

What hast thou done?

Was hast du getan?

 

The modern way to speak in english is in german the honorific way.

What have you done?

Was haben sie getan?

 

I think this is a French Influence of " vous", since this is "vos" in spanish and they also had that incluence in latin america (sea argentina/urugay talking with vos or in brasil voce).

 

A weakpoint of modern roman Languages are Nouns, but they are strong with Verbs.

Besides of Romanian, it still can use Nouns very flexible as it was in Latin.

 

German in the other Hand is very song with Nouns.

 

Haven't seen much advantages in Adjectives so far.

 

Sorry if written a bit confusing and with losing a bit the Point :P

 

I am on the Way to Work ^_^

 

Btw. I like english, besides its Flaws, i am watching mostly Stuff in english :P

[Zenki]

4 minutes ago, Azuris said:

 

English and French suffer from the same historical Influence they have got.

 

French is a romance Language that first got a heavy Influence from celtic Languages and than from germanic Languages (first the main Land ones, later english).

English is a germanic Language with heavy french, latin, celtic and other Influences.

 

Both have moved way apart from their roots, the Pronunciation is not as close to the single Letters as it is with other Languages of their Family and the Grammar also changed much.

 

Spanish for Example is one of the closest what comes to every Letter is spoken as written.

English is brutally far away from that Ideal and French also.

Also italian is very close to that Ideal.

 

As an Example, i can speak spanish, german, english and italian.

I can easily talk to portuguese People with some Effort or to Dutch.

I also learned Italian because of the Relationship (latin is the Mommy).

But French? I can now read and understand it mostly because i have learned Italian, but there is no Way i could understand it.

Without School i would never have learned English in a "natural" Way.

 

Also the loss of many Terms and other Forms makes english strange and somehow limits the Way you can Express Things.

 

English would be also easier to understand for others (german, dutch) if it still would use "Thou".

 

I am not sure if i am using it right, but i try a little comperasion:

What hast thou done?

Was hast du getan?

 

The modern way to speak in english is in german the honorific way.

What have you done?

Was haben sie getan?

 

I think this is a French Influence of " vous", since this is "vos" in spanish and they also had that incluence in latin america (sea argentina/urugay talking with vos or in brasil voce).

 

A weakpoint of modern roman Languages are Nouns, but they are strong with Verbs.

Besides of Romanian, it still can use Nouns very flexible as it was in Latin.

 

German in the other Hand is very song with Nouns.

 

Haven't seen much advantages in Adjectives so far.

 

Sorry if written a bit confusing and with losing a bit the Point :P

 

I am on the Way to Work ^_^

 

Btw. I like english, besides its Flaws, i am watching mostly Stuff in english :P

 

That was greatly pleasant to read ! I learned english at school and A LOT with videogames (and then english subbed videos) and i just love "olde" english, as you mention "Thou" which is the same as "Tu" in french, second person singular.

 

But i love old french too, which is almost unreadable, even for french native speakers.

 

Btw, learning German as my second langage helped me a loooot when i started learning english. And i can understand a very few of italian/spanish because some words are pretty much the same yeah.

 

 

I really liked reading your post, i'm sorry that my english is poor, not sure you'll understand (or everyone else haha) what i'm trying to say :)

[NiGHTMARE]

13 hours ago, Doomkid said:

I swear that "rule" is wrong more often than it's right!

 

I believe there was an academic study a few years ago which proved there are more "exceptions" to the rule than there are words which conform to it.

Edited May 31, 2021 by NiGHTMARE

[TheMagicMushroomMan]

3 hours ago, Dark Pulse said:

Well, it's pretty simple.

 

One way is pronounced "Mass-a-chew-sets."

 

Your grandfather's way is pronounced "I'm wrong."

 

Also, relevant to your particular problem...

 

 

 

That's when you run into problem #2:

 

"Everyone tells me I'm pronouncing this word in an entirely fucked way, but I'll keep doing it regardless because I think everyone thinks everything I do is cute even though I'm a COMPLETE FUCKING DUMBASS FROM ALABAMA AND I'LL BEAT YOUR ASS IF YOU THINK OTHERWISE. BACK IN MY DAY WE DIDN'T CARE ABOUT STUPID SHIT LIKE WORDS! THIS IS AMERICA AND I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT!!!

[MS-06FZ Zaku II Kai]

15 hours ago, Endless said:

Let's not forget that pronunciation is god awful if you're not a native speaker. You pretty much have to memorize all the sounds.

 

Holly shit this pronounciation rules so much! It almost sounds like latin.

[Gez]

5 hours ago, Dark Pulse said:

Shaddap unless you're gonna try to explain that "four twenties" shit.

"Four score and seven years ago..." is not a speech that was said in French.

 

If you prefer, you can look at the Swiss or the Belgians and get "octante" and "huitante" as alternatives.

4 hours ago, Dark Pulse said:

How the fuck, with that numbering system, did you get "four-twenty"?

It's not Roman, it's a remain of the Celtic language. Used scores instead of tens.

Edited May 31, 2021 by Gez

[Tony_Pepporoni]

8 hours ago, Doomkid said:

Oh shit, Tony Pepperoni doesn’t approve of my hyperbolic diatribe? Well shit, I must be doing something wrong if I don’t have HIS overt blessing!

I giggled at this one, but if I actually had to be serious about this i'd like for someone to name a language better than english. Because everything else seems like a confusing archaic pile of symbol combinations or no better

[dew]

Czech language is ultra-violence difficulty by itself. And Czech grammar? Nightmare, even for natives. Possibly the biggest grammatic pitfall is the equivalence of "i" and "y", they're the same phonetically in Czech, but there are complex rules on which one should be used in written form and kids spend a LOT of time grinding them in elementary school. E.g., there's the conformity of subject and predicate in the plural:

male animate: The men went silent. = Muži utichli.

male inanimate: The winds went silent. = Větry utichly.

female: The women went silent. = Ženy utichly. But also: The songs went silent. = Písně utichly.

middle: The animals went silent. = Zvířata utichla.

 

This is annoying, particularly when it becomes contextual. "What about women? They went silent." "A co ženy? Utichly." You can see how the context can get lost. Also a group of twenty women and one man would follow the male animate case, talk about patriarchy. :V

 

But it gets worse. There are letters, like "r" or "k", that can only be followed by "y", unless it is a foreign word. On the flipside, only "i" goes after "c" or "ž". Then there are hard letters like "t" or "n" that are only followed by "y", except if you use "i", they become soft letters "ť" and "ň", spelled differently, but the accent is not written. And then there's the ambiguous letters like "b", "s" or "v". Here the language outright gives up and there are no rules - there are only "listed words" that go with "y". Kids learn them as you'd learn a poem and they're practiced by the teacher reading out trick sentences and kids writing them down with no help tools. It's called "the dictate", heh.

 

But hey, still better than Danish.

 

 

[JBerg]

16 hours ago, Lol 6 said:

Don't worry, spanish is waaay harder

 

I think he's talking about inconsistencies of English and not how hard it is to learn.

[Novaseer]

I saw a comic the other day that argued that "shit shit shit shit shit shit shit" is a valid sentence.

[xX_Lol6_Xx]

38 minutes ago, JBerg said:

 

I think he's talking about inconsistencies of English and not how hard it is to learn.

Yeah, but, spanish has dumber rules and thousands and thousands of irregular verbs, which makes it even more inconsistent.

[roadworx]

54 minutes ago, Tony_Pepporoni said:

I giggled at this one, but if I actually had to be serious about this i'd like for someone to name a language better than english. Because everything else seems like a confusing archaic pile of symbol combinations or no better

"i can't learn other languages so therefore they all suck"

 

to answer your question, as a native english speaker i find that russian is far more consistent as well as more simple overall

[1Destro3456]

11 minutes ago, Lol 6 said:

Yeah, but, spanish has dumber rules and thousands and thousands of irregular verbs, which makes it even more inconsistent.

Yep, even if I'm a native Spanish speaker my Spanish school class has always been my worst

[Tony_Pepporoni]

 

 

25 minutes ago, roadworx said:

"i can't learn other languages so therefore they all suck"

 

to answer your question, as a native english speaker i find that russian is far more consistent as well as more simple overall

Yeah, that's the problem even after you mastered it it's all bland codes that you could mistake for another little code and next thing you know you're getting a tampon offered to you all because you fucked up the symbol organization or forgot a note, plus the point of languages is to make it easier to speak to other people there is such as too much for anything like simplicity for example, i mean nobody here really likes pong right?

Edited May 31, 2021 by Tony_Pepporoni

[JBerg]

48 minutes ago, Lol 6 said:

Yeah, but, spanish has dumber rules and thousands and thousands of irregular verbs, which makes it even more inconsistent.

 

As someone who knows Spanish, I don't agree that the grammar rules are dumber than the English ones.

[Tony_Pepporoni]

7 hours ago, Dark Pulse said:

Box = Boxes

Ox = Oxes Oxen

Sheep = Sheeps Sheepen Sheep

 

Why do they call them cowboys? Cows is girls, bulls is boys. Oughta be cowgirls and bullboys.

 

Why do they call a statue a "bust" when it stops right before the part it'd be named after?

 

Why do they call them buildings when they're already done building them? They oughta call them "builts."

 

Why do they call it a TV Set when you only get one?

 

Why do they call a women's prison a "penal colony?"

 

I can't take credit for any of those questions above, though. I'll just leave this here. He's got some extra wisdom past that, if you care to watch the whole thing, such as on pronunciation with how words are spelled.

 

 

Bceause Cow Boy was a job created hundreds of years ago and it means a man that moves cows across lands therefore it's fast term is Cow Boy english has many terms so you can disclose or speak as fast or slow as you need or want, also because it seems like it was busted off, therefore a bust off of a statue and considering that bust would contain the most important organs, it would be just called a bust and also because it seems like the most statue part of the statue therfore it is called the bust metaphorically for both results... buster, and it's callled a building because it still needs to be maintained and therfore rebuilt again and again and if not it would be a structure, it's called a tv set for it's insides therefore it is an electronical set, and also they are both called penal colony equally, i apologize if it is not a joke, and if it is a joke.

Edited May 31, 2021 by Tony_Pepporoni

[Hypnotik]

Spend years in School to learn how to properly speak and use English --> Only to use Slang, 90% of the time in the Real world.

[illwieckz]

18 hours ago, Reelvonic said:

also flammable and inflammable have the same definition

 

In French, inflammable means “can be put on fire”, we use “ininflammable” for ”cannot be put on fire”, “flammable” being a mistake, a word that must not exist and that is sometime made up by ignorant people misunderstanding “inflammable” (wrongly believing it means the opposite). But what's fun is like, In french we say “habitant” for what English uses for “inhabitant”, but in French we say “inhabité” (“inhabited”) for place without “habitant”, so place without inhabitant. So, “inhabitant” is consistent with “inflammable”, and “habitant” is consistent with “flammable”, but “inhabitant” and “flammable” are used in English and “habitant” and “inflammable” are used in French. But, well “flammable” was probably a mistake in English at first.

 

[Zulk RS]

19 hours ago, Doomkid said:

"Every dog has it's day"

*its

 

Jokes aside, English is my 2nd language and I have this weird thing about it where I find the grammar to be confusing and hard but actually speaking the thing is sooo simple and easy. So I'm in this weird state where, whenever I try to say or write something in English, I just spit out whatever is in my head without thinking about grammar. Turns out, I make less mistakes when I don't think about grammar than when I do. I don't know why that happens but again, I try not to think about it.

[Teo Slayer]

I always wondered, how is it called, Colour or Color?
 

[NoXion]

4 minutes ago, Teo Slayer said:

I always wondered, how is it called, Colour or Color?
 

Depends on which side of the Atlantic Ocean you're standing.

Edited May 31, 2021 by NoXion

[Teo Slayer]

1 minute ago, NoXion said:

Depends on which side of the Atlantic Ocean you're standing.

I'm in east

[Zulk RS]

If I recall, it's colour for the UK and Europe and Color in America.

[Gez]

53 minutes ago, Zulk RS said:

If I recall, it's colour for the UK and Europe and Color in America.

Europe doesn't speak English outside of the UK. (Okay, and Ireland, where the Irish language has been nearly extinguished.)

And America-the-continent also contains Canada, where it's colour, too.

Edited May 31, 2021 by Gez

[Master O]

9 minutes ago, Gez said:

Europe doesn't speak English outside of the UK. (Okay, and Ireland, where the Irish language has been nearly extinguished.)

And America-the-continent also contains Canada, where it's colour, too.

 

And much of the South Pacific speaks English, including, but not limited to:

 

Australia

New Zealand

Solomon Islands

Tonga

Samoa and American Samoa
Fiji

Vanuatu

Northern Marianas Islands (US Territory)

[Labryx]

For me personally I always hated the:

 

Could've/Could have vs. Could of

 

Where the latter isn't even grammatically correct yet for some reason my brain always defaults to that spelling when I'm writing something.