a new chapter

[ＤΞＬＴΛ]

Hey guys!

 

So I was on discord when someone has having a less than ideal time with their life, I stepped in and tried to help them out and then all of a sudden, it just... Clicked.

We started to talk more and more until we had a bond going. I had never felt so loved by someone in my whole life, the same problems they had, I had as well, we are just about the same age, and we are furries. We started to talk more and more and the more we talked, the more of a bond I started to get with him. Only downside is that it's currently a long-distance relationship but I plan to have him come to south australia (maybe with a friend too as well) and live together. This is because he lives all the way in america. I threw away my heterosexuality in favor of being there for him. I made a brief status update regarding this but this is a cut down version of the full story. I'm so happy right now, you can not believe how happy I'm to have someone who loves me. Thanks for listening guys and take care.

Edited August 8, 2023 by DELTA256

[ＤΞＬＴΛ]

SIDE NOTE: I may make a tribute map for my babe, I'm not sure yet...

[Chezza]

The first bite of a decadent mud cake is so sweet and heavenly. So much so, I'd marry the pastry Chef to bake me all the sweet goodness that fills the gaps in my life.

 

But by the 10th bite into that cake, the magic was gone and I regret my decisions. I hurt the Chef and myself, and feel even worse than before. Sick, stupid and guilty to boot. Maybe I was being too rash and just assumed if I latched on and committed to this cake the magic would never go away? I don't think I truly cared for the Chef but rather the feeling I was given.

 

Maybe, I should have stuck with ordering a small slice of cake, eat it and cherish it slowly, and know there is more out there when I really need it. Maybe what I really needed was an apple pie and a friend to share it with.

 

This is my cake story.

Edited August 8, 2023 by Chezza

[Herr Dethnout]

So, to make the long story short, you're bisexual now?

 

Well, good for both I guess :P

Edited August 8, 2023 by Herr Dethnout

[dasho]

This sounds like the beginning of many stories in which someone was ultimately taken advantage of. I would urge an extreme amount of caution.

 

It may also help to try to step back and ask yourself if this sounds like healthy behavior from either person in this scenario.

[Redneckerz]

As much as i am happy for OP, i prefer the full story, if one really has the need to share something this personal. As it reads now you changed sexual preference (straight to bi or gay) overnight as if its just something you could do with a flick of a switch.

 

Knowing my recollections and stays at the heartbreak hotel, this warrants a fuller picture.

[mrthejoshmon]

All of my relationships have been...

 

Turbulent... To say the least.

 

Them moving to Ozzyland reminds me of my first (and messiest), long distance relations are a fucking nightmare and I am never doing one ever again, also moving to a new country is an arduous process and even then they might even be denied access (long story from me on that one, less said the better). I pray for it to work out but I'm kind of stuck upon that "threw away my heterosexuality for him" line, so as a raging bisexual I ponder the obvious question:

 

Are you actually attracted to men or is this a more pan thing? This is out of curiosity more than anything because that was a weird thing to say, almost sounds like you got fuckin groomed.

[OniriA]

3 hours ago, DELTA256 said:

I threw away my heterosexuality

 

 

[aloysiusfreeman]

Self-actualization is a wonderful thing - just hope chasing that high doesn't have a steep drop off. Be patient with sudden impulses that are really big (long-distance, someone you just met online moving over). 

 

 

[ebrl]

In today's edition of "ever had the impression that you're talking to a child?" And how the hell do you even discover you're gay through discord, of all things? Is this my "am I out of touch" moment? Not against people being happy but also not particularly excited for someone to lose a kidney in a zoomer honeytrap scam.

[MFG38]

1 hour ago, Redneckerz said:

As it reads now you changed sexual preference (straight to bi or gay) overnight as if its just something you could do with a flick of a switch.

 

If it was that simple, I'd go bi.

 

This sounds a lot like what my best friend went through more than once - the few long-distance relationships she had always started the same way, only to end in the ugliest ways possible after less than a year. I don't want to discourage you, @DELTA256, but I do want to tell you to be careful out there.

[OniriA]

I throw away my heterosexuality aswell anytime I see a hot stud in a magazine. Until my girlfriend returns from work that is.

Edited August 8, 2023 by OniriA

[magicsofa]

27 minutes ago, ebrl said:

And how the hell do you even discover you're gay through discord, of all things? Is this my "am I out of touch" moment?

 

I would guess that @DELTA256 wasn't 100% hetero already or at least, not sure about it... a lot of people don't feel like they know until the option is really in front of them. Also, people really like to draw a line somewhere, which is probably never the Real Truth but helpful in committing to a transition.

 

5 hours ago, DELTA256 said:

I plan to have him come to south australia (maybe with a friend too as well) and live together. 

 

You mean come to VISIT. You need to survive two weeks together, as well as the space afterward when they go back home, before committing to anything more. This will pretty much be forced upon you by the immigration process anyway so just get used to it.

 

You should also vet this person from as many angles as possible. This is one instance where prying into their social media accounts is totally acceptable, since your literal safety depends on it. You should be able to get to know not just the person, but some of their friends and/or family. If they are reluctant to include you in any sort of group interaction, MAJOR RED FLAG. (not wanting to come out to their family is a possibility though, but there should be someone they trust that you can eventually talk to without their supervision).

 

 

EDIT: This kind of thing can work, one of my best friends actually did this exact thing and now lives in Finland with his lady that he met on Battlefield or something. But they spent like 2 or 3 years just visiting each other before he moved. Also, women are statistically safer to be around so yeah, welcome to the wonderful world of Can I Trust This Man?

Edited August 8, 2023 by magicsofa

[Decay]

So basically from what I understand, you aren't even an adult yet, have autism, flipped sexuality on a switch, and are inviting basically strangers to live with you for a while that you met over discord, a platform known for people taking advantages of others, at least partially designed by furry pedos, which you have only have had for a week?

 

The internet was a mistake.

[Zulk RS]

7 minutes ago, Decay said:

So basically from what I understand, you aren't even an adult yet, have autism, flipped sexuality on a switch, and are inviting basically strangers to live with you for a while that you met over discord, a platform known for people taking advantages of others, at least partially designed by furry pedos, which you have only have had for a week?

 

The internet was a mistake.

 

Hold up. Did I miss a page here? Where did you get all of the stuff from? I didn't get any of this stuff from OP's original post.

 

EDIT for clarity: The above is a genuine question. I don't know where you got this info from but I want to know.

 

Also to OP, I can't really say anything on the topic since I have never been in a relationship before myself. However I will advise to be careful. Don't trust strangers on the internet at face value when it comes to super serious stuff like inviting them to live in your house and have relationships.

Edited August 8, 2023 by Zulk RS

[Decay]

1 minute ago, Zulk RS said:

 

Hold up. Did I miss a page here? Where did you get all of the stuff from? I didn't get any of this stuff from OP's original post.

 

Also to OP, I can't really say anything on the topic since I have never been in a relationship before myself. However I will advise to be careful. Don't trust strangers on the internet at face value when it comes to super serious stuff like inviting them to live in your house and have relationships.

 

Just take a glance at his profile/status updates. Obviously doesn't care for the fundamentals of privacy either. Literally begging to be taken advantage of.

 

Edit: I have seen this kind of shit time and time again in the Doom community. It always turns out bad. People looking for attention in the wrong places are always going to get fucked over by those who take advantage of the people who want/need/crave attention or validation.

Edited August 8, 2023 by Decay

[Zulk RS]

11 minutes ago, Decay said:

 

Just take a glance at his profile/status updates. Obviously doesn't care for the fundamentals of privacy either. Literally begging to be taken advantage of.

 

Ah okay. Thanks for the info.

 

EDIT: So... OP got Discord at around August 1. So this whole talking to someone and clicking and forming a bond is less than a week long affair.

To use OP's own words here, you "threw away your heterosexuality" after talking to someone for less than a week... online... on Discord.

 

Don't take this as me trying to invalidate your feelings about the guy, I am really not, but maybe give it a few more months? I mean the Honeymoon phase in relationships is something that happens, or so I am told.

Edited August 8, 2023 by Zulk RS

[G19Doom]

My spider-sense is tingling said Spider-Man after reading this. 

[aloysiusfreeman]

To OP - don't take this like we're talking shit or anything. Just don't let any impulsiveness take you somewhere that you haven't put to much thought into. 

 

[Zulk RS]

13 minutes ago, aloysiusfreeman said:

To OP - don't take this like we're talking shit or anything. Just don't let any impulsiveness take you somewhere that you haven't put to much thought into. 

 

 

This. Very much this!

[TheCaneOfTheTophat]

As the above have stated, We're not talking shit or trying to take away your happiness, but perhaps step back a bit. Considering how you both only took 1 week to decide that you're going to meet up, then you're most likely putting yourself in a very dangerous situation. And even if it's safe, Infatuation/love at first sight is not an ideal basis for a relationship. Please take a step back, make sure both of you are in it for the long run, and put your safety above all else.

[fraggle]

6 hours ago, DELTA256 said:

So I was on discord when someone has having a less than ideal time with their life, I stepped in and tried to help them out and then all of a sudden, it just... Clicked.

We started to talk more and more until we had a bond going. I had never felt so loved by someone in my whole life, the same problems they had, I had as well, we are just about the same age, and we are furries. We started to talk more and more and the more we talked, the more of a bond I started to get with him. Only downside is that it's currently a long-distance relationship but I plan to have him come to south australia (maybe with a friend too as well) and live together. This is because he lives all the way in america. 

 

I hate to be the cynic here but how well do you really know this person? Maybe he really is the love of your life, but there are also people out there who will say these kinds of things to you to manipulate you. In particular you should be very skeptical if this person starts asking you for money for any reason whatsoever, including to buy plane tickets to come and see you. Here's a list of reasons they might give.

[Gregor]

I know love tends to make you blind so you probably won't care, but this sounds very unhealthy. And unfortunately unhealthy relationships almost without fail lead to tremendous pain. A functioning relationship needs balance and a healthy dose of independence from both sides. It sounds very much like the opposite in your case. You most likely either gonna suffocate him with your enormous emotional needs or he gets tired of you after a while; I don't think you can even be sure at this point whether you really love him or are just looking for someone to solve your problems for you since you come off as quite desperate. And desperation is not a great ingredient for love nor is it particularly attractive to anyone. Having similar problems may be the basis for a friendship but not for love; at least not for long. I feel like you're setting yourself up for a major disappointment/disaster and this could do some real damage to you when it happens. You need to slow the heck down.

 

Take it easy and take care.

Edited August 8, 2023 by Gregor

[Stupid Bunny]

Yeah, I, um…you really need to think this through. Your very apparent need for any kind of validation make you extremely vulnerable and, even if this person isn’t trying to extort money or god knows what out of you, you are still almost certainly going to get very hurt if you don’t pull the drag chute a bit and take this all much slower. You can’t seriously consider letting someone live with you who you have only known a week and never met in person. If they have any kind of issue with that kind of sensibility than they are either toxic or are trying to scam you.

 

I remember what it was like to be young and excited and desperate too. I know how it feels. Just trust me that, no matter where this goes, you’ll be far happier if you keep your senses about you and don’t rush into something very serious. Oh yes and listen to fraggle, don’t send them money for anything at this early stage in your relationship. I promise you don’t know them well enough to trust them with that.

[Azuris]

9 hours ago, DELTA256 said:

Hey guys!

 

 

Hey Delta256!

You seemingly are struggling to find yourself and you have some insecure Stuff going on, this is something that happens to everyone and normal.
Some struggle more, some less.
Your Autism surely will make Things more complicated in finding your Way.

I really suggest you to search out for an Therapist, that will help you on finding the right Way for you.

This is nothing against what you feel or the Person you found in the Internet.

But in your Position you could get mentally destroyed by others you reach out full with Hope.
Be careful.

[Herr Dethnout]

5 hours ago, Decay said:

So basically from what I understand, you aren't even an adult yet, have autism, flipped sexuality on a switch, and are inviting basically strangers to live with you for a while that you met over discord, a platform known for people taking advantages of others, at least partially designed by furry pedos, which you have only have had for a week?

 

The internet was a mistake.

Normal zoomer behavior(?

[Murdoch]

12 hours ago, DELTA256 said:

Hey guys!

 

So I was on discord when someone has having a less than ideal time with their life, I stepped in and tried to help them out and then all of a sudden, it just... Clicked.

We started to talk more and more until we had a bond going. I had never felt so loved by someone in my whole life, the same problems they had, I had as well, we are just about the same age, and we are furries. We started to talk more and more and the more we talked, the more of a bond I started to get with him. Only downside is that it's currently a long-distance relationship but I plan to have him come to south australia (maybe with a friend too as well) and live together. This is because he lives all the way in america. I threw away my heterosexuality in favor of being there for him. I made a brief status update regarding this but this is a cut down version of the full story. I'm so happy right now, you can not believe how happy I'm to have someone who loves me. Thanks for listening guys and take care.

 

Delta I am sorry to be yet another person pouring cold water on this but my dude you really need to stop and take a big breath. You seem to be at a time in your life emotionally where you barely know which way is up. It is not the time to be making big decisions like suddenly changing your sexuality or getting someone to move half way around the world to be with you. Rushed relationships don't have a good success rate in the best of circumstances, young relationships don't either, and long distance even less so and the consequences of those going wrong once someone's gone halfway around the world can be catastrophic. Whatever you do, please just take a breath, relax, and take your time. Don't let your emotions cloud your judgement and pull you into bad mistakes. If he's just as vulnerable as you are right now, that makes it potentially even worse.

 

I am giving this guy the benefit of the doubt but as others have pointed out, it could be someone with ill-intent. Be smart, don't give away any information that could be used against you, don't even think for a second about giving him money, and don't put yourself in a position where your physical well-being could be compromised.

Edited August 8, 2023 by Murdoch

[Decay]

2 hours ago, Herr Dethnout said:

Normal zoomer behavior(?

That's really reductive and just not true. I might've only signed up for Doomworld in 2016 but I've been part of the community since 2009 and started looking around in 2007. This kind of behaviour is not new at all even just for the Doom community, and it's happened many times before I came around too. 

 

It's easy to say "today's youth are messed up" but realistically it's just that communication tools are easier to use and more accessible for a larger age group, and it's more public than before. These kinds of problems have been persistent forever and will continue to persist.

[Kwisior]

Doomworld has fallen. Billions must DIE.

Edited August 9, 2023 by Kwisior

[aloysiusfreeman]

14 hours ago, Decay said:

That's really reductive and just not true. I might've only signed up for Doomworld in 2016 but I've been part of the community since 2009 and started looking around in 2007. This kind of behaviour is not new at all even just for the Doom community, and it's happened many times before I came around too. 

 

It's easy to say "today's youth are messed up" but realistically it's just that communication tools are easier to use and more accessible for a larger age group, and it's more public than before. These kinds of problems have been persistent forever and will continue to persist.

 

I will sat at least to my own experiences, that neurodivergent kids will likely be using the internet more in depth than kids their own age, and likely much earlier too. There's a lot of pros to this (able to find some form of community that is lacking in their immediate area), but yes as you said this behavior is not new at all and being off in the wild so to speak can let one's guard down.