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i fell like i don't belong and everyone is collectively ghosting me all the time.


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I apologize if I came off as rude, I was just trying to be direct, because I've seen this kind of lament before: I'm not getting feedback, therefore people are purposely avoiding me; I'm struggling to make friends, which clearly means I'm being gatekept out of the community. Ultimately posts like this are a cry for attention and validation, but they do that by framing the overall lack of engagement as something being done to the OP rather than just a fact of a disconnected, slow communication medium that is old-ass web 1.0 forums like Doomworld, which is frankly unfair to everyone reading this thread from the word go. Nobody here owes anyone anything except basic respect (and again I apologize for being abrasive) -- if you're not getting the kind of feedback and engagement that you want, it's on you to figure out why instead of blaming others. So, again, the answer here -- and this is the touching grass part -- is to get one's priorities straight, stop treating the community/the internet as a whole as a personal hugbox/dopamine dispenser (and blaming a bunch of strangers for not meeting expectations) and actually get more involved in the community if you want engagement, as it's a two-way street.

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1 hour ago, june gloom said:

I apologize if I came off as rude, I was just trying to be direct, because I've seen this kind of lament before: I'm not getting feedback, therefore people are purposely avoiding me; I'm struggling to make friends, which clearly means I'm being gatekept out of the community. Ultimately posts like this are a cry for attention and validation, but they do that by framing the overall lack of engagement as something being done to the OP rather than just a fact of a disconnected, slow communication medium that is old-ass web 1.0 forums like Doomworld, which is frankly unfair to everyone reading this thread from the word go. Nobody here owes anyone anything except basic respect (and again I apologize for being abrasive) -- if you're not getting the kind of feedback and engagement that you want, it's on you to figure out why instead of blaming others. So, again, the answer here -- and this is the touching grass part -- is to get one's priorities straight, stop treating the community/the internet as a whole as a personal hugbox/dopamine dispenser (and blaming a bunch of strangers for not meeting expectations) and actually get more involved in the community if you want engagement, as it's a two-way street.

i took the lack of engagement too personally and let my overthinking get the best of me. it was just on my end, all in my head, or if there where any form of like ignoring, it's either blown out of proportion or it's just me thinking that the community was smaller and more insular than i thought it was. reassessing things. thanks for the reality check.

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I made a complaint about the community unfairly, and when i did, i got engagements and the community answered. I feel both grateful and a bit off put by my own actions, there was something bothering me this whole time, and it was me playing victim and taking lack of engagement as some sort of cabal of hate against me. However I'm glad i made this pose, it's a real wakeup call for me and, probably almost necessary. As for the future engagement in the community, i'll likely just keep working on my mapping and modding. sorry everyone.

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On 3/28/2024 at 10:33 PM, Scuba Steve said:

Given the fact that this is a pretty niche hobbyist forum, with a sizable LGBT population.

 

We need more progressive spaces for people to hang out in to prevent radicalization that loneliness and unhealthy online spaces cause. If you wonder why I have become charitable to a fault when attributing malice towards others it's because I think most people would behave themselves just fine if allowed to spend time in more diverse spaces and talk with those people.

 

You're a sweetheart for saying this Scuba.

 

Just so you know 💜

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On 3/25/2024 at 8:47 AM, SkeletronMK666 said:

hello, skeletronMK here.


Hey Skeletron, just wanted to let you know I remember you. Your MK mod for multiplayer doom was rad and I had a good time playing it with you even if I didn't stick around for too long... So it's a bit upsetting seeing you breaking down all like this on the forums. Just keep trucking on and participate in the community as much as you can!

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On 3/28/2024 at 5:33 PM, Scuba Steve said:

We need more progressive spaces for people to hang out in to prevent radicalization that loneliness and unhealthy online spaces cause. If you wonder why I have become charitable to a fault when attributing malice towards others it's because I think most people would behave themselves just fine if allowed to spend time in more diverse spaces and talk with those people. I often ask myself; I was a lonely and awkward young man once and, given the right circumstances, I could have easily been radicalized by far-right propaganda. If Doomworld hadn't been run by an ultra progressive cabal of communist antifa socialists, a Doom forum could have easily devolved into a very bro-oriented community.

To this point, I've considered something similar a few times. I am being completely unironic when I say the youtube algorithm can genuinely change your life. When I was in early high school cringe compilations, "commentary" channels, and figures like Ben Shapiro were being pushed pretty hard into my youtube recommendations. I watched and even thought stuff like this was funny at the time. I believe had a certain channel not appeared to me one day and made me start questioning this content I would have probably continued to consume it, and would probably carry pretty different beliefs today. I know it sounds a bit ridiculous, but if you're a young person who considers themselves a social outcast its pretty easy to fall into and align yourself with certain corners of the internet, probably without even consciously realizing it. 

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4 hours ago, Egg Boy said:

To this point, I've considered something similar a few times. I am being completely unironic when I say the youtube algorithm can genuinely change your life. When I was in early high school cringe compilations, "commentary" channels, and figures like Ben Shapiro were being pushed pretty hard into my youtube recommendations. I watched and even thought stuff like this was funny at the time. I believe had a certain channel not appeared to me one day and made me start questioning this content I would have probably continued to consume it, and would probably carry pretty different beliefs today. I know it sounds a bit ridiculous, but if you're a young person who considers themselves a social outcast its pretty easy to fall into and align yourself with certain corners of the internet, probably without even consciously realizing it. 

- i probably hang out with people who feed into my paranoia and i need to just leave them behind and move on. Honestly i was in a server for  a bit that had a lot of people who where banned form doomworld and i had to leave it because a large portion of them where just homophobic and transphobic.

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