should i

[Sephiroth]

should i keep up with my story, what do u like about them what do u hate. any thought or sudgestions

[EllipsusD]

I like how your story is presented very logically in consideration with the situation. Most stories call the Hellspawn by their name as far as the game goes, and it makes sense that someone actually in that situation would not know to call a Cacodemon a Cacodemon, etc. Describing what the protagonist sees is a very effective method.
I also like the continuity that the story has so far. Each peice fits perfectly with the next making the big picture seem that much more coherent.
Basically, you should stick with the writing technique you are using now. It works.