Castle Wolfenstein 0.2

[dsm]

Ominous Rumors – Chapter 2

It was a particularly cold night in March 1943. It snowed and a white carpet covered the roofs and cobble in the village. It was also particularly foggy and the dreadful Castle Wolfenstein couldn’t even be seen from the village to the joy of most of the villagers – the castle inspired fear in most of the villagers.

The inhabitants of the village had no idea what had transpired the last night and none suspected what was about to happen. Nobody except Krämer. He lay sleepless in his bed, looking into the wooden ceiling of his bedroom. His thoughts concerned about the Castle and very recent events.
Something disastrous had happened last night – something which shouldn’t have happened. He had seen it with his own eyes while waiting for someone to arrive at the castle.
Now he couldn’t help but feel helpless.
This night must be horrible to spend in the dungeon of that damn castle he thought with a shudder...

****

In a cell deep in the filthy dungeon of Castle Wolfenstein sat a man in deep thought. The man was quite big, had very broad shoulders and seemed to be quite strong. He wore black clothes and an as of now empty army base belt.
He had light brown, brushed-back hair with a reddish tint and his narrow, blue eyes revealed that he was very tense. His unshaved, edged jaw was set tight. He was biding his time, listening and waiting.

His name was Blazcowicz and he was an American spy for the Allied Forces.

Sergeant William Joseph Blazcowicz, also known as “BJ” among both his superiors and comrades, had been sent on a mission of grave importance. Unfortunately, he and his buddy had been captured near the castle. He was a spy for a very secret organization, which didn’t even officially exist.

BJ was an aggressive character. During a time where gangsters ravaged his home city of Chicago, he had taken the law into his own hands a number of times despite his youth, yet he had prevailed. He had been thrown in jail a couple times, often because of brawls with various unpleasant types of people, and in jail he further put his survival instincts to good use and quickly became respected among his fellow inmates – this was where he was first called “Billy Jospeh”, which was later shortened down to “BJ”.

He volunteered for the Army Rangers when war broke out in Europe. Although he was American with all his heart, he still had a great love towards the original home of his family – Poland. When the German army occupied Poland, BJ was enraged beyond recognition. Hearing more and more about the Nazi plaque, which spread across Europe, and how the people in Poland suffered under German occupation, B.J. began to hate Nazis enormously - more so than anything else.

His very special characteristics along with the fact that he was the best Ranger in his unit soon led to his recruitment into the Office of Secret Actions.

He was one day called up to his Colonel’s office. He hadn’t been in the army for much longer than three months at that time.
BJ was very surprised to see a civilian in an army office, sitting next to his C.O.
“Private Blazcowicz?” The man asked politely.
“Yes Sir?” BJ replied, slightly surprised at this unlikely fellow.
“Private” the Colonel cut in. “This is major Joe Hawkins. He wants a word with you in private, so I’ll leave the office to you”
“Yes Sir!” BJ replied, slightly baffled. The Colonel left.
B.J. looked at the man in front of him, waiting for what he had to say. The man had black, curly hair brown eyes which lay deep in the sun tanned face. Hawkins was looking at some papers resting on his lap.
What the Heck is this all about? Blazcowicz thought.

“You have quite an interesting file Private Blazcowicz” Hawkins said without looking up from the papers.
“You’ve been in a lot of dangerous situations during your civilian life, getting into trouble with the law as well as the underworld I see”
“Well that’s correct, Sir” BJ replied doggedly, wondering what interest this bloke could have had in his past civilian life.
“I have an offer for you” the man said indifferently to BJ’s reaction. “Please don’t ask any questions before we arrive” Hawkins continued.
BJ was now very puzzled. He was just about to enquire what the Major meant by “arriving”, but managed to stop himself.

“Follow me, please” Hawkins continued as he got up from his seat

-

Major Hawkins brought BJ to what looked like a factory. They ended up in a secret cellar, which turned out to be the recruitment office of a secret organization. This was where BJ learned of his future occupation as a spy and “special operations operative”. Yet the name of the organization was kept secret to him, so that he could not reveal to others which organization he was working for. The organization was the Office of Secret Actions, but BJ didn’t learn that until years after the end of the war.

The OSA was founded in 1942 alongside the OSS – the Office of Strategic Services. The OSA was in many ways similar to the OSS, but the OSA was only formed as a temporary organization to be dissolved when the war came to an end. The OSA’s agents, primarily Army Rangers, were all well trained in combat and infiltration and they were all given very little information as a rule of thumb. The OSA wasn’t exclusively an American organization. The organization had British members and operatives as well, as the British had a lot of first hand experience with Germany.

BJ accepted the offer as soon as he was told that he was supposed to infiltrate Germany and not only gather intelligence, but if enough intelligence was gathered, he was also to carry out sabotage or even assassination missions.
He wasn’t given any details about how the organization worked or who his superiors were, only enough to know that the organization concentrated its efforts on Germany. Already speaking German fluently, and having a lot of pre-war experience in “special” situations, BJ seemed an excellent choice for a spy.

His training began soon afterwards and he soon showed that he excelled primarily in actual combat though he was very clever too, able to solve complex problems while under pressure.

His training soon moved to Northern England, which became his base until he was sent on his first mission.

A mission which would prove to be fateful.

...

[pritch]

The scene is set up really well for the impending mission! Nice work DSM, I can't wait...

[Livo]

Nice but the phrase "and seemed immensely well trained" doesn't seem to make sense. I mean, there's no real information close to that phrase to suggest that he IS well trained. Also, there's no explaination as to WHY he seems well trained besides the fact that he is in deep thought. Something else like he seemed alert, focused etc would have been better.

Perhaps it could have been "and seemed well trained in guarding his emotions", then for this line "narrow, blue eyes revealed that he was very tense", the tense part could have been swapped for "his narrow blue eyes were the only indication that he was incredibly (or very) tense"

Bah- dsm's a much better English teacher than I am :p

[dsm]

Well, I meant that he was well-trained physically. Anyway, I've altered it (though I'm not sure if I've altered it to the better).